Celebrating The "Women Of HOPE" - Journey # 3

~~Mar's Story~~

April 23, 2005

I was doing my job, my job that I loved so much. I was a nurse, and I worked on the med-surge floor at Medina Memorial Hospital. One of my CNAs asked me if I would please help her pull up a patient in bed. I said yes, that I would help her. When I did that, my left leg stayed attached to the floor. It did not move with me. As I did that, the top part of my leg (the thigh) went to the right. The bottom part of my leg (the calf) went to the left...instant pain, dropped to the floor. That night was so very busy. I got an icepack and used an ace bandage to keep it in one place. We had 30 patients and there were just two of us on the floor. No time for me to stop doing what I loved to do. When I got done with my 12 hours shift....... I thought my leg was going to fall off. I called my PCP when I got home that am, and went right over there to see him. He sent me for x-rays. Then he told me that I needed to go to an Orthopedic Surgeon.

May 9, 2005

I went to the surgeon and he said that I tore my Medial Meniscus and that I broke a huge piece of the end of my Patella.

June 22, 2005

I had Arthroscopic Surgery to fix what I had done to my knee....the recovery from this was pretty long, and a lot of physical therapy!!

December 26, 2006

The day after Christmas... .I went out to turn the outside lights on in the garage. On my way there....... .I fell on the patio. The cement patio. I tried really hard to guard my knee. That did not work out so well for me! My knee crashed on the patio. I was on the ground, in the snow...it was snowing. I had my cell phone with me THANK GOD! I called in the house, and Dylan was the only one that was here with me. He was playing with his new toys. I said to him, Dyl mommy fell and I am out on the patio and I cannot get up! He said mommy, I am playing with my new toys! hahahah I said Dyl I need you to call Gam and Pap (my parents). He called them and told them what had happened, but he forgot to tell them that I was still on the ground! My poor son, he was pacing waiting for my parents! They came and helped me in the house. I looked at my knee....it was an instant bruise a really bad one, the whole knee.

I immediately called my surgeon; He said to ice it, and that he would see me in the morning. I went, and he did an MRI...he said that it showed nothing. Well, months went by, and I kept having so many problems with walking, and the pain. I went back to him in July and said that something was really wrong in there. He then did another MRI and said that I needed to have another surgery that I had broke a HUGE piece of the Patella on the Medial side. He then said that he was going to do a surgery that was called Drilling and Coning....which meant that he was going to drill many tiny holes in my knee and hope that the cartilage would grow back.

August 1, 2006

The day that my WHOLE life changed....I woke from the surgery screaming, and crying. My knee was burning SO bad! He was the first face that I saw when I woke. He told the nurse to give me some more medication, and the nurse said that she just had given me some. He told her that he did not care, that she needed to give me some more....I was still screaming, that burning pain, that pins and needles pain....did not stop.......the recovery from this surgery was HORRIBLE! I had to do physical therapy, and I could not do it.....I could barley walk, and that burning pain...still there. After a while he said that he would do a cortisone shot. When he did that, it was soo bad, hurt so bad! The pain was intensified from that shot.

October 19, 2007

A year and two months later....... ..the surgeon finally said that he thought that there was something more going on in the knee...he sent me to about five other doctors to confirm what he was thinking that I had....they all agreed with what he was saying....He thought that I had CRPS.

He sent me to a Pain Management doctor....I was evaluated by him......at first he said that he did not think that I had it. I went back to him about two weeks later...he then told me that I had CRPS.....

After that we tried two Sympathetic nerve blocks. The first one lasted until I got out to the truck to go home. The second one lasted about one week. We have played around with my medication this whole time....nothing seems to be working out so well for me. He often talked about the SCS....I had a lot of thinking to do about that! I talked it over with my husband, and with my parents. My husband said that he thought anything at this point was worth a try. My parents said the same thing. I still was not convinced that I should do it....I did not know what to do. The flares for me were so bad, the discoloration, the burning, stabbing shooting pain, the hypersensitivity. I could not even wear pants, in the winter I was wearing shorts when I had to go out.

One night I had a horrible flare, it was the worst ever. I called my mom, and her and my dad came to my house. They were begging me to please try the SCS...there were a lot of emotions at that very minute. At that point, I decided that I had to try the SCS. I tried the trial surgery first. As soon as the SCS was turned on.....oh man, I felt relief!!! It was sooo nice! I had the trial in for four days....I did not want it to come out! I wanted to run away with it in!!

July 8, 2008

The date that my permanent SCS was put in....this surgery was different. I was awake for most of the surgery so that I could tell them when I felt it and things. Then I went to sleep while they put the battery in.
When I awoke, the pain was not so bad, but the battery site was BURNING!! They kept telling me that it would go away. Six months later they were still telling me that the burning pain would go away! I think that the SCS helped with my CRPS pain for about a month. Then things changed....and changed for the worse. I have had eight re-programming done....still with little to none difference.. ..

February 2009

At this point......the SCS is doing nothing for me. I tried to do what they call the "holiday". That is when you turn your SCS off for a week and see what happens and they say that it might reset the brain. Well, while it was off, the only things that I noticed about it not being on was that my legs and feet were very purple and red...also, I noticed that the spasms that I have in my calves were worse! The burning, stabbing shooting pain that I have always had......was no different with the SCS on or off.... The battery site......still BURNS like crazy.

This last time that I saw my PM he gave me some Lidoderm patches for that site. They seem to be helping some what...but the burning is still there... He also increased my Kadian (morphine) too. He said that maybe that would help through out the day. So far, I do not notice a difference at all.

Through this whole thing, I am trying to stay positive. My children.... .oh dear, I feel so bad for them. I was the active, sports mom. And now, I am not! It is hard for them to understand
why.......they ask, and I have to tell them that I cannot do something and it breaks my heart! Work........ oh, how much I miss working. I know that at this point, there is no way that I can go to work.

Depression.. .......sometimes , it is really bad. I feel sorry for myself, and I know that I can not do that. Everyone has bad days right? Well, my bad days seem to be more than that good days!

My marriage.... .I am not even sure that it can survive this. So many things have changed.... I will say, that I have met, and found some wonderful people that also have CRPS. They understand what I am going through every day!

I do have HOPE, and I will always have HOPE! It is a struggle everyday....
......but, I will make it!!

~~Marlene~ ~